A few people have been asking me where the concept for Re:LIFE Re:lational came from (click the image to see full invite). So before the launch I thought it might be a good idea to share the heart behind it all.
When I was in Nicaragua, the reality of poverty was never so clear. But as the typical ignorant North American, I began shooting out ideas about business and sustainability because I wanted to do my part. The response from the locals was polite but they corrected me. They gently informed me that because the need is so great, any programs and funding get swallowed up with a focus on just survival before anything else. In other words, you can’t begin fixing the roots until you get past the symptoms on the surface.
So on our Journey of Compassion there, during the medical clinics, the first thing we did was provide de-worming pills. To provide a meal and medicine alone would have been futile because the parasites in their stomachs would have stolen all the nutrition.
The same principle applies locally. There is no point in explaining to a someone who is hungry and asking for a sandwhich why they are in poverty and how to break the systemic cycle before actually meeting their first physical needs. The same is true for addicts who need to detox from the physcial addictive state first before they have a window of lucidity to make the tough choices of recovery.
What does this have to do with relationships?
It was during a coffee with Megan that I recognized I was being guilty of the exact same thing I did in Nicaragua in the context of relationships. I have been on a crusade for the past few months to get people to be generous despite the worst economic conditions we have seen in decades. But through my chat with Megan I realized that people we were talking to were in their own form of “Relational Poverty.” People have been telling us that they know literally hundreds, even thousdands of people they have to relationally manage, yet they feel like nobody really knows them. This is not an uncommon situation where we find ourselves surrounded with so many people yet find ourselves lonely with nobody to really call a friend.
Re:LIFE Re:lational is our run at Relational Poverty. But we’re taking a little bit of a twist. We are sparing no gory and brutal detail behind the reality of why happy and healthy are so hard in today’s increasingly complicated society. I am learning every day, but I like to think I have been around long enough, done enough counselling, pre-marital coaching, given oodles of dating advice and made a mess of my own life enough that we can have a pretty interesting discussion.
I really do encourage everyone to come out if you are looking to connect on a deeper authentic level. Under the surface of the fun and shock-value we really do just want to build relationships. But let’s face it; people are tired of feeling like losers because they are alone on weekends or don’t have a significant other. We want communities of security and significance. I don’t enjoy watching people I genuinely care for wallow in loneliness and wonder how they need to FIX the GAP in their lives when there is so much LIFE to live!
Then there is the issue of Stampede week. Those who are close to me know I LOVE competing with activities people would rather be doing such as going to movies, bars, clubs, sports and other socially normal behaviours. Why? Because it makes people really think about their choices. On one hand we are offering an opportunity to try something unique and get to know yourself and others better. On the other hand, Stampede does only happen once a year and you have a right to blow off steam because the rest of the year will be stressful and taxing – especially in this economy we could all use a little reprieve. My point is YOU have to make the CHOICE based on YOUR LIFE… not my expectations or an attempt to be polite.
I will always try to polarize people with my Re:LIFE. LIFE is about extremes. LIFE is about hot or cold, not luke-warm. LIFE will always want ALL OF YOU and not a compartmentalized version that plays it safe in comfort. But despite the surface discomfort and risks, LIFE has so much abundance and love to give. LIFE will always love you whether you are paying attention or not. I am just trying to provide an opportunity for LIFE to truly shine in your world.
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